Saturday, July 18, 2009

Nanageddon

The last 2 days have been so much fun. On Friday night I went to a loft party hosted by a high school friend. It was a bit awkward at first being surrounded by so many familiar faces whom I never talk to anymore, but once I got some silver bullet in me (Coors), I warmed up to everyone. You know when you go to a high school party and there are people there that you go to school with but you never talk to even though you have class together and you guys both know who each other are yet you still don't ever acknowledge the other's presence? Well, this high school reunion party was awesome because all the people that you used to do THAT with no longer act awkward or stupid and you can have legitimate and interesting conversations with them. The highlights of the evening were:
(1) the entire party getting up and dancing to Le Tigre's Deceptacon
(2) discussing the differences between a good and bad lap dance with my new friend Paris (a boy)

Saturday we had a yard sale. We made over $300, which I split 50/50 with my brother. Ugh, and tI had to deal with SUCH AN ASSHOLE! I live on a steep hill, and we were eating lunch when I see this fat guy (possibly Armenian or Indian?) panting up my driveway with one of our yard sale signs. This is the conversation that ensued...
FAT ASS: WHO ARE THE OWNERS OF THIS HOUSE?
Me: Um, me. (My mom wasn't around.)
FAT ASS THROWS THE SIGN AT MY FEET
FAT ASS: DID YOU KNOW YOU PUT THIS SIGN ON MY PRIVATE PROPERTY? THAT IS CALLED TRESPASSING. I COULD GET YOU ARRESTED.
Me: Ohhhhh I'M SOOOORRRYY, I guess I didn't realize. (Being super sarcastic and overly nice)
FAT ASS: I DO NOT WANT THIS ON MY PROP
ERTY, YOU WERE TRESPASSING. THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN DO YOU HEAR ME?
Me: Oh I hear you loud and clear. It will NEVER happen again. But as for you, you're currently trespassing on my property and I would like you to leave. Have a nice day.

And then as he left I yelled to my mom, "HEY, WE GOT IN TROUBLE!" And he turned around and was all "WHAT!?" And I was all "NO SIR, I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU, HAVE A NICE DAY!" And then he huffed his fat ass down the hill back to his ugly ass house. Meanwhile, you should know that this sign was on a telephone pole in front of his house. On the side walk. I would have apologized sincerely if he had been nicer about it, but he was being such a DICK so I was a dick right back to him.

As a reward for the day's hard work as salesman/bouncer, me, Courtney, and my mom got mani/pedis. Also, at the yard sale, I rescued a variety of great silk fabrics my mom was trying to give away. I'm making a series of skirts/dresses with them. Then we cooked an elaborate steak/chicken/cat dinner for my French family. At dinner, we discussed condoms and styrofoam/glass sex toys.


In this photo you can see one of the fabrics and my blue manicure.


I'm so excited for Tuesday because I'm going with Quinn, Tessa, Tessa's dad, and Alyssa to a Mighty Boosh signing and then secret show at The Bowery! If you do not know The Mighty Boosh, then here are a variety of links I reccomend you watch.

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